Like a pedicure for a double leg amputee it would be most inappropriate at the moment for me to give my personal take to the Kiks & Mandaya Project I signed up for. So I outsourced.
Boy meets boy. Boy fucks boy. Boy loves boy. Other boy do not love boy. The oldest story in the world. Hence the letter below.
(NOTE as in NOTE. Bryan is neither boy or other boy. My story is more of a pornographic tragedy. This is a non-fiction)
(contact me if you wish to decrypt the text below)
This is the first letter I am writing you and i find it even difficult to start...It must have been plain attraction the first time I saw you but what happened afterwards surprised me...Everything happened so fast and it left us both hurting...I am writing this letter to you to let you know that I'm in a journey towards making peace with you and hopefully lessen the hurt we are both experiencing...
I am sorry I scared you, I did not realize that because I was scared myself...Scared to let you go...I honestly felt something special for you and I never wanted to let go no matter how hopeless it may seem...I was a little crazy, I guess but I just thought of fighting for what I feel, endure whatever comes because I thought in that way you would appreciate that kind of love I am willing to share with you...The kind of love many people dream of but seldom find...
I don't want to feel angry or bothered anymore because it only attracts angry and negative people in my life...Dont worry, this time no more threats, no more demands...I will be waiting at the center of the soccer field at Burnham park from 5 pm Saturday until 5 pm on Sunday.
I am doing this for myself...I want to earn your respect and I want you to feel my sincerity that I desire nothing but your forgiveness...
After doing this sacrifice, only then I can forgive myself for hurting a man to whom I promised 5 years of my life...
It's your decision if you still wanted to talk to me, with everything that happened between us, I understand if you're not yet ready to see me and I will not force you again...
What kind of love I have for you, I cannot say...All I know is that it exists. It's like the wind, you can`t see it but it is there... To only love is my passion in life.
Meeting you made me learn 2 things
1. how to love someone
2. how to let go of someone you love
...But I guess I am not that smart enough to remember both...I can only remenber the first one...
With you, beside you
"One person can't be happy enough for the two of us."